(Note: The absolutely hilarious thing about my last post is that I completely forgot that I wrote it, and since then have been absolutely astounded (several times) that I have ADHD. And yes, I still maintain that I am the only person on Earth surprised by this.)
Sliding Doors was a 1998 film about how different life can turn out just by simply missing a train. One little change starts a chain reaction that results in completely different outcomes. Lots of books have been written and movies have been made using this premise (Serendipity and About Time, for example). It's an intriguing thought, isn't it? If only I'd said yes or no... If I had done this or that... If I had just moved three inches to the left, or left 5 minutes later... That is the path to madness, because of course there is no way to change those things. And by choosing something else, we sacrifice many of the people and circumstances in our life now.
In October-November 1988 I temped in the PR office of the Jewish Community Centers of Chicago. That November 9-10 was the 50th anniversary of Kristallnacht, the Night of Broken Glass, a pivotal event in what would become the Holocaust. I wrote many press releases during those weeks I was there, as well as articles about Holocaust survivors' memories of that night. There was a home for elderly Holocaust survivors, the Selfhelp Home on the street right behind my apartment building, and I hadn't even known about it until I typed that up in that tiny office. The remembrances of this awful night were moving and sad. I have thought of that job often over the 37 years since then. What would it have been like to experience living in Nazi Germany at that time? For the people that escaped the country, how did they know when to leave? What was the final straw that propelled them to leave family, friends, their country, and their livelihoods? They grieved for those family members who did not leave, those who suffered and perished. But what did they see that others did not? Or was being part of the Resistance the better, more noble path? There is nothing shameful in just keeping your head down and getting through each day, either. All different paths to follow, and no way to know the outcome of either one.
So here we are in March 2025, not even two months after an evil man who is hellbent on destroying our country has taken office. There is a lot of opposition and resistance, but he, his minions, and his oligarch handlers are cutting a huge swath of chaos across this country. This has caused the stock market to plummet, and inflation and unemployment to rise. Morale is low and fear is high. Presidential terms are four years, so we usually know we have a good chance of a change if we can just stick it out. But our Russian-backed Commander in Chief is not-so-playfully talking about changing the Constitution to eliminate the two-term limit. Every day I read the news and think, "Inconceivable!" but I don't think that word means what I think it means anymore.
But what do we do? Outlive and outlast? Cut our losses and run? Europe looks pretty good right now. Canada looks even better, but I doubt they would let us in. How do you know when to leave? What can we learn from those people all over the world in the 1930s and 1940s that figured it out and knew when to go, though not knowing where they would end up? How do I advise my kids so they can thrive and succeed in their lives? Am I reading too much into this and getting caught up in the fear that is everywhere around us? How do I stomach being in the same room with those who voted for this creature? Have to coexist with them?
For now, I am reading, not watching TV (the orange one's voice churns my stomach), researching, thinking, observing, and absorbing. I'm choosing my friends and associates carefully. I'm encouraging my kids to get their finances in order and update their resumes. We're putting in a garden this year so we're not quite so reliant on high grocery prices. I'm grateful I work from home now so I don't have to put so many miles on my car. I am amazed at the little decisions and random acts that moved my life from point to point to where I am now, a few of which I recognize but most of which I am completely clueless about. But where do we go from here? Which train do we take?