Dear Ben (and Jerry)

Dear Ben and Jerry,

I watched Jimmy Fallon awhile back when you unveiled your new flavor in his honor. You were very funny (and you both look great--congrats on the weight loss!), and I could tell Jimmy was really excited about having his very own ice cream. I happen to love your ice cream, though perhaps a bit too much, if you know what I mean. But in my quest to acquire a healthier lifestyle, I decided to forgo dairy products. After that show, all my vegan hankerings went completely out the window. Vanilla ice cream, potato chips, chocolate, caramel! Heart attack in a carton, more likely, but impossible to resist.

But I've been thwarted at every turn! I've searched store after store in our lovely state of Utah, but to no avail. Then I found your Flavor Locator online. At last! I would know where to look! I believe your little gadget has a glitch in it, as it tells me it's not available in Utah yet! My sister in St. Louis can find it at Dierberg's, for crying out loud! (You can thank me later, Em). We're the #1 Ice Cream Consumption state in the country here in Utah!

I guess begging won't do much to speed things up. Please note, however, that a very devoted family is anxiously awaiting Late Night Snack.

Yours Sincerely,
Diane


UPDATE:
Well, their precious little Flavor Locator is defective! On a whim, I checked for it at Macey's here in Provo, and there it was! So excited I actually screamed (not too loud, but my kids were amused). Couldn't wait to try it, expecting something amazing, and.... it was pretty good, but not earth-shattering. I like Stephen Colbert's Americone Dream better. Sorry Jimmy!