Back To School

I started back to work today. It felt great to see everyone and be back where I feel like I contribute something. My opinions mattered and I felt real affection from everyone. Thanks for making me feel so loved, girls!

When I got out of college I got a hot-shot job in Chicago where I got to spend other people's money by the bucket load and was wined and dined every day by very nice people with bottomless pockets. It was awesome! Lunches, dinners, parties on boats, seaplanes at my disposal--what a great job. Of course it was the 80s and no one bothered about silly details like where the money was coming from to actually pay for it all. Not my problem! Then I got married, and we decided that I would stay home with the kids when we had them. By that point, I was so starved for babies that I couldn't wait to stay home and sew Halloween costumes and bake cookies.

Well, we were naive about how far money really stretches. Sure, you can make your own baby wipes and drink only powdered milk. I know people who have done just that. But it wasn't long before the needs of our family outstripped my economizing skills. Little jobs started coming my way for lots of different things, but I was always able to still be at home.

When Tinkerbell started first grade, I realized how much I hated being in an empty house. Of course there is still a mountain of things I could spend my time on--ironing, laundry, dishes, paperwork, cleaning--but it was miserable not having a little voice in the house with me. So I started working at her school.

My first job there was teaching Gifted/Talented in grades 1-6. I had never taught before, and suddenly I had to come up with a curriculum map and daily lesson plans for the entire year. It was overwhelming and I really didn't know if I could do it. But with lots of help from my colleagues I slowly got the hang of things and began to settle in. Soon I wasn't just trying to keep the kids corralled but actually sitting with them and laughing over their writing and silly jokes. I got hugs in the hall, sweet love notes from six year-olds, and parents told me how much the kids loved my class. My day was full of positive reinforcement and I found that working with kids, even other people's kids, was the most fun I'd ever had on a job.

As my own kids have gotten older, my desire to stay home has lessened and lessened. Of course I love summer vacation--who doesn't love sleeping in and having no particular place you have to be every day--but once school starts back up again I couldn't imagine being home alone to work on projects, no matter how desperately they need it. I feel like I've found something I'm good at and really love, and that's more important even than the pay cut we all took this year to keep doing it. And that's truly saying something.